DaVinci, DiCaprio and Me
My newsletter at first was like; jg;lakd opafpidj fk jdufoaujp tojdjajfo psodkfp. Because I couldn’t find my glasses. Did I leave them upstairs? No. In the car? No. I didn't leave them. I was literally standing in the kitchen, wearing them, using them, reading the back of a cookie box, when the phone rang, I spoke on it, went back to reading the box, except my glasses were now gone. Poof! I’m not a magician or anything but the way they just vanished into thin air, with no magic wand, no secret hand movements, leads me to believe, maybe I am a magician? Where the F are my glasses. Where did they go? Were they on my head? No, because they’re missing an arm and my poor little sad one armed glasses can’t stay up in my hair. Were they on my face? No. Because I couldn't see the keyboard and was typing like; djfja;ldfj fd;aldf fkdlf;ak!!! Now blind, I had no choice but to go to my favorite place in the world beside the dog trails, HomeGoods and quickly buy some new readers. After returning, and while emptying the bags of truly unnecessary new stuff, Christmas decorations, drinking glasses with Snoopy and the peanuts gang printed on them, pine scented candles, a pedestal cake stand for a cake I’ll never make and a stand that I’ll never use, but it's so pretty…I stepped on something? My one armed glasses! Turning them into a monocle.
Wonder what else is broken? Let's see….
Useless Thoughts
We had a real scare there for a moment with MATT GAETZ being nominated for Attorney General, while his eyebrows stayed up, he stepped down. F*cking Phew! But the fucking phews are rare and the crazy just keeps on coming like Trump’s latest pick, LINDA MCMAHON to lead the Education department. Linda is famous for turning the World Wrestling Entertainment into a multi billion dollar enterprise. So ask yourself, not what your country can do for you but what you can do for Wrestling? I know when I think of my kids and their education and what their future holds, the first thing that comes to mind; The WWE. What? You don't? How can you call yourself a patriot? You should really get on TikTok if you want to learn and understand true history. 🤼
Linda encouraging students
Speaking of true history, I watched the Ken Burns documentary on LEONARDO DAVINCI; Turns out he was funny and charming. Everyone liked being around him. He was the most inquisitive person that ever lived. He spent his life asking why? How? He kept journals for every thought he had about animals, the human body, with detailed diagrams of his findings and creations, inventions like the parachute, kites, cars, planes. Most people think of him as a painter. Lol a painter! That was just his day job. He rarely finished a painting, choosing to focus most of his time on his real passion… learning. He immersed himself in nature. Studying it from every angle, with all his being. Which reminds me of the famous Einstein quote;
❝
Look deep into nature, and then you will understand everything better.
- Albert Einstein
Which is what Leonardo did. Anyway, suffice to say he was the smartest man alive! A total rockstar! 🕺
I can't help but laugh when I click through the channels and see JAKE TAPPER interviewing some future Trump cabinet member freak. How does he do it? Seriously, how does he get up each morning and go to work having to talk about the same bullshit every day, forced to pretend like this is all normal. The pain in his face literally makes me laugh, like the way you laugh when something horrible happens and you’re in complete shock and don’t know how to react and your nerves get the best of you and you start laughing? Yeah like that. 🤣
Speaking of laughing, ARIANA GRANDE & CYNTHIA ERIVO endless interviews where they cry every second talking about their great connection is becoming tiresome. Why are you crying? You’re talking about a movie, a movie!!!! Not a medical breakthrough but a musical.. The endless crying and the push back at interviewers because they are offended by the stupid questions or triggered.. It's a lot and needs to stop! You’re singing in a movie. You’re play acting. Lighten up!
LEONARDO DICAPRIO and “dear friend” KATE WINSLET share a kiss as they reunite at a movie screening. He then choked from the shock of kissing an “old” woman. Gross! Seriously they should just put us all down and be done with us once we hit the age of 40. 💀
He should have just pushed her off the boat.
But seriously we women play into this beauty and youth narrative too with magazine covers and social media content. Like PAMELA ANDERSON for instance. Not sure if you’ve heard the breaking news; she stopped wearing makeup and everyone (women) started freaking out and screaming about how brave she is. She’s getting awards and is celebrated with article after article about the fact that she doesn't wear mascara. Guess what? Either do I. Give me an award! Do a big write up about how courageous I am. Where’s the paparazzi when I’m leaving Trader Joe’s? Look! No makeup…ever! I’m so amazing. Put me in the history books, Julie Stone, right under Jonas Salk. Twinsie Heroes! 👯
And Finally…
I definitely would suggest checking out the Ken Burns documentary on DaVinci. It’s fascinating, but it does get a little boring at times, a little mind numbing, but then pulls you back in. I’ve always been obsessed with Leonardo and had watched some random YouTube videos on him, but couldn’t wait to find out more about him, like what was his favorite TV show? 🤪 Watch here
Jim Gaffigan’s new comedy special tonight on Hulu! Watch here
New Jim! YES!! Just what the doctor ordered. Huge Gaffigan fan. I will be watching this tonight for sure, but if you haven't heard his past standup, before you take on this new one, please follow my recipe for the absolute perfect Friday night!
Light a fire
Pack a bowl
Grab some Twizzlers
Get all cozy on the couch
Have the dogs come up on the couch and snuggle in.
Put on “King Baby” and “Beyond the Pale” his older specials and just listen. No TV. Just sit and listen and laugh your damn ass off! I promise! Camping and Jesus have never been funnier.
Until next time folks! Check out my new post on Instagram later today and please send my newsletter to all your peeps and tell them to subscribe!
And…Sorry you can’t unread this! 🤪
