😎 Big Beautiful Breakup

Hey Kids! Proud Boys! We have some sad news. Sit down. We’re breaking up! We’ll deal with the logistics and custody soon to figure out who gets the Nazis and who gets the clowns.

Let's take a look at the BIG BEAUTIFUL BREAK-UP!

TRUMP: I’m very disappointed in Elon.
ELON: Without me Trump would have lost the election.
TRUMP: People leave my administration and they love us, and they miss it so badly and some become hostile, I guess they call it Trump derangement syndrome
ELON: Time to drop the really big bomb:
Trump is in the Epstein files. That is the real reason they have not been made public.
Have a nice day, DJT!
TRUMP: Might consider cancelling Elon’s government contracts.
ELON: He should be impeached.

Wowzers! Let's be honest folks, when breaking up, if you really want to crush someone's soul and hurt them more than physical abuse, ghosting is the way to go. There’s nothing worse! Being ignored is as painful as torture.

But good news! There'll be no pain. No ghosting. Because we’re not dealing with just a jerk, or just a narcissist, or jilted lover, but instead two sociopaths, who can’t shut up, who will one up each other, and who will fight to the death to get the last word in.

One of them is on some serious brain altering drugs, while the other has no brain.

So, in a way it's a fair fight.

I wish it actually was a real fight, with a ring, and a referee…

MICHAEL BUFFER: Ladies and gentleman, in this corner, weighing in at 236 pounds, but really 275 pounds, standing 6 foot 3 inches, but really 6’ 2”, hailing from Mar-a-Lago, with a record of six corporate bankruptcies, and 34 felony counts, you know him as orange and gross, the one and only POTUS!

And in this corner, standing at 6' 1” and weighing in at 193 pounds, an avid ketamine user, and father of 14 children with four different mothers, not including Amber Heard’s kids. The proud former leader of DOGE, who cancelled funding for the World Health Organization, Unicef and the U.S. President’s Emergency Plan for AIDS, where it’s estimated over 300,000 children will die within the coming weeks. The creepy owner of Tesla, whose stock finished down more than 14%, losing $150 billion in market value. You know him as the man who ruined Twitter, the one and only Elon!

We all know what happens to folks who break up with Trump, just ask John Kelly, Bill Barr, Mike Pence, James Mattis, Mark Esper, General Mark Milley, Rex Tillerson, Nikki Haley, Chris Christie, John Bolton, Mick Mulvaney, the mooch, Michael Cohen, etc. etc. etc.

Breaking up with Trump is probably similar to when Aaron Rodgers breaks up with you. Every woman he’s dated, always walks away traumatized, and needs unending therapy.

Which reminds me of a recent quote from Rodgers’ ex Danica Patrick…

And because the nature of the relationship was emotionally abusive, so that wore me down to nothing. Everything was torn to bits. He leaves a trail of blood.

— Danica Patrick

Luckily for us, we’re all just spectators in this shit show and can grab the popcorn and enjoy the tweets, etc. and hopefully the White House becomes so personally chaotic that nothing will get done. Everyone will be so busy running around in circles that evil ICE (hired white supremacists) will take a few days off from arresting the most vulnerable, scared Moms and Dads, scared high school kids, scared innocent people who just want to survive and thrive away from their horrific countries, to live the American dream, but now is their American nightmare. I’m so sorry. This crazy needs to have an end date. WTF!

Until next time.

Sorry you can’t unread this!

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